Falling In Love Again
by supersecretninjapenguin
Summary: The war has begun and the stakes are high. This has everything to lose. Just before Jeanine wages war, Tris discovers that she is pregnant. Will she be able to fight and will her child live?
1. Chapter 1

**Yay! Guilt fan fiction! Not really. I came up with this one a while ago. I don't have much yet. Just a few glancing ideas and cute scenes I want to work up to. Normally I don't like pregnancy fan fictions about FourTris because it just seems out of character. They're both kind of prudes. I doubt they would have an early kid like the rest of Dauntless. But I really just wanted to just screw characters and profiles and just write something fluffy and cute for you guys. Enjoy! Let me know if I should continue.**

Tris

Secrets. They are one of the only intangible things that aren't really there but that weigh more heavily on your mind and body than a million bags of sand.

And as I am pulled into the train car by the person in front of me, the weight seems heavier. Combined with the fear of not having Tobias there with me, it threatens to crush me with its heft.

What if Tobias isn't Divergent, like I thought? What if he's just like the mindless Zeke, helping me onto the train this very moment?

My mind bounces back and forth, trying to decide which is more important right now. Tobias or our baby?

I haven't even met this child. As I search for Tobias in the train, this child isn't even really a child. It's a tiny speck living in my body, not even recognizable as life. Yet I can't help wanting to ditch my training and run for cover to avoid whatever fight is about to happen. I can't help but want to protect this speck.

Even as my mind is on Tobias, it is on the Speck. Will it grow into a girl or a boy? Will I live to bring it into the world? Will we both die? Will it live?

I wonder if someday in the future, our child will have to wonder as well; wonder what has happened to its parents.

Will I ever meet my child?

So, immersed in my thoughts, I jump a little when I feel something touch my hand. Fingers.

Fingers curl into my hand, clasping it. I turn my hand a bit, praying to God that it is imperceptible. Tobias. He's here. He's next to me and safe.

I grip his hand back to let him know I feel him there. In my peripheral vision, I can see a smile on his face-so small it's not even there.

Tobias

Practice has allowed me to fix my face in a dead expression and calm my heartbeat. Still, it is hard to do. My heart still races, despite my long, steady breaths through my nose and my repeated comforting thoughts.

'She's not dead' I keep thinking it again and again. If I repeat it enough, I wonder if it'll come true.

Tris is smart. This I know is true. I just hope she's smart enough to realize what's happening and blend in. If they realize she's not some mindless drone, they'll shoot her without hesitation.

My eyes slowly drift back and forth, searching for her hair. Her hair that reminds me of clean sunshine and her eyes that remind me of fresh air and open spaces. It takes all of my will power not to scream her name at the top of my lungs.

Then I see her.

I see her, sleep lining her eyes in darker lines than the others. She looks paler than usual, her eyes empty. For a moment, I think I might be wrong, that she isn't Divergent. That she can't see me. But then she reaches up and brushes a string of hair behind her ear. She must be incredibly tired if she's stupid enough to do that openly. Luckily, Max and Eric didn't see it.

Zeke pulls her inside and steps aside, allowing her to shuffle inside. I shift so she will end up by me.

Close up, I can see that something is different. Her hair is in a ponytail, but it's loose and messy, as if she pulled at the hair before realizing it was stuck in a hair band. The areas under her eyes have this dark purple discoloration, like she didn't sleep for even a second. Her eyelids are lined with red as well, like she's been crying. Worst of all, her hands are quaking.

I inch my hand to the right, slipping my fingers between her shaking ones. She jumps, as if I had poked her with a hot needle and not just taken her hand. I frown a tiny bit.

Relief still courses through me though when she squeezes back.

The train leaks passengers slowly. So slowly I consider shoving a few people out to get out faster. I feel this animalistic need to get Tris alone so I can make sure she's alright.

When I finally get out, Tris jumps down behind me. She stumbles a little before I grab her arm to steady her. I can't have anyone seeing it. Once she's okay again, we keep marching, just another pair of supposedly mindless drones teaming up.

My surroundings bring back bad memories. We're in the Abnegation district, on streets identical to the one I lived on my whole life. Maybe even the same street. I can never tell.

Marcus lives in House 37, and we're in the 1-15 Houses. But each house looks like his, each house a reincarnation of my childhood and the hell my father put me through.

Tris

I feel sick. In school they told us that if you're pregnant, you shouldn't feel this much morning sickness so early, so I don't know if I'm imagining it or if it's really there. But I honestly feel like I'm going to puke on the sidewalk. Tobias and I keep walking, getting closer to Max and Eric with each step. We're within eavesdropping distance now.

Tobias keeps his gaze fixed ahead, and I do my best to copy him. I unfocus my eyes and keep marching, shoving my weak stomach into the recesses of my mind. Eric watches with a twisted grin on his face as we near him.

"Look at you now...the Great Four." He laughs, stepping in front of me. My heart stops, my eyes wanting to focus again. I know I can't suddenly focus again; he'll notice. I can see over Eric's shoulder as Tobias turns and watches, dead eyes not betraying a thing.

His hands, however, tell a different story. His index finger tightens ever so slightly over the trigger of his gun, readying itself to shoot at a moments notice.

"Think either of them are Divergent?" Max raises an eyebrow, watching Tobias carefully.

"Don't know." Eric's eyes bore into mine, searching for something I hope to God he won't find. "You know, I never really got why he liked her so much. Think she's good in bed?"

"Ew." Max wrinkles his nose. "Gross."

"Shall we find out?" Eric smirks, stepping back. My heart won't shut up.

I have a baby. I. Can't. Die. I have to keep it safe. I have to do something. I see Tobias' lips twitch downward, his knuckles whitening with the strain to not shoot Eric in the head.

"Eric. She's a soldier."

"Just curious. Jeez." Eric smirks at Max. "Besides, who will notice one Stiff missing?"

"Fine. Take her. Just kill her when you're done with your gross game." Max waves a dismissive hand and Eric scowls, turning back to me. He reaches for my waist and I hear the click from a cocked gun.

"Touch her and die." Tobias' face is woven with disgust and fury as he holds the gun to the back of Eric's head. Without a seconds hesitation, I raise my gun to Max, who raises his to Tobias.

"You wouldn't shoot me." Max growls. All traces of sickness have been temporarily erased from my mind as adrenaline fights its way through my body.

"Try me." I dig the gun into his head. "Drop the gun or I shoot. And I don't think you want that."

"Fine." Max lowers his gun, pointing it to the ground.

"Drop it." Tobias orders. Max follows the order, dropping the gun to the ground.

"Kick it toward that house." I say, jerking my head toward the house behind him. He listens, kicking it away. "Now get down. Lay down."

"Wha-"

"Now!" I aim the gun at his head again and he drops to his stomach. Keeping the gun pointed at the ground where he is, I shove my elbow into Eric's head. Tobias swings his gun over his shoulder and grabs me by the elbow, pulling me behind him.

We sprint down an alley together, keeping a free hand on our guns. When we come out the other side, a shot is heard. It whizzes past my head, narrowly missing my ear. We both hit the deck.

I can hear his breathing next to my ear. I can feel my pulse racing in my feet.

"Go." He hisses, popping up onto his knees and shooting at the attacker. Another bullet whizzes past his head and he ducks again. "Tris. Why didn't you go?" He frowns at me. Another gun goes off from a different angle and I flatten myself again, covering my head.

"Uh..." Should I tell him? How do you tell your boyfriend that? 'Hey honey! I know we're being shot at right now and I know that I'm only sixteen, but I'm pregnant! Congrats!' Nope.

"Behind you!" He shouts. Acting on instinct, I roll onto my back and shoot the guy behind me just as Tobias shoots from his upright position.

"Thanks." I smile sheepishly.

"Would you sit up?" He peeks over our safe wall for a second to shoot a couple times.

"Um..." I check for any attackers in view. "sure!" I roll onto my knees and shoot over the wall.

"Thank you!" He calls, shooting over my shoulder. I spin and shoot at a soldier approaching behind Tobias.

"Sure thing." I grunt. Another soldier creeps into view, past the wall, while Tobias is turned.

I don't seem to think of our child in that moment. All I think about is the bullet barreling toward Tobias' head and the soldier who fired it. I shove Tobias back by pushing his shoulders and I duck myself, feeling the bullet fly past. Tobias twists around and shoots, watching the soldier fall.

"Cover me." He orders. We both sit up, looking over the wall. I count six soldiers approaching. They're like bruises. They're everywhere but we never saw them coming.

"Got it." I shoot over his head at a short Dauntless.

"Going to explain why you're acting like an Amity?" Tobias asks, shooting down another. It's disheartening when another takes his place.

"You're not going to like it." I shake my head, shooting another and ducking.

"Well now I have to know!" He laughs, ducking so he's looking right in my eyes. "On three."

"Onetwothree." I count fast and sit up, shoot, then drop.

"What is it Tris?" He copies me, shooting twice. I don't get a chance to see if he hits.

"Um..." We both sit up, shooting.

"Tris!" Another falls to his bullets.

"Fine! You wanna know?"

"Yes! Please!" Tobias glares at me, shooting again.

"I'm pregnant!" I shout over the firing guns, watching his face fall apart.


	2. Chapter 2

**Hello all! I was very surprised that five people already favorites this,but figured I was safe to post another chapter. I have to write a little more for the next chapter and I have another story I need a chapter for as well as a couple stories on Wattpad I'm wanting to get up and running. I'll do my best for you. Thank you for reading!**

Tobias

If you ever get that feeling where you think you're in a dream you can't wake up from? Then you know how I feel the moment that word slips from Tris' lips. She's pregnant.

Tris is pregnant.

There's a baby growing inside her. My baby.

I drop out of sight for a second, my brain freezing. She drops to my eye level as well.

"Pregnant." I shout. "As in a baby?"

"That's usually what a pregnancy is, Tobias!" She shouts over the noise, sounding frustrated.

"Wha-How?"

"What are you? Five? There was a class about this in school!" She points to her stomach. "Yours. Here."

"Shut up!" I laugh. We both sit up again and fire. She holds her gun up over my shoulder and shoots at someone behind me. "Why didn't you tell me sooner?" I ask.

"I was a little busy being shot at, you know?"

"Yeah. I know the feeling." I grin wider.

A soldier comes running at Tris from behind. I duck, hauling her downward and into my chest as I shoot him. He falls to the ground, gasping for air. She raises her face from my shirt, smiling.

"Thanks for that."

"You're welcome. Just please don't die."

"I'll try my best." She rolls her eyes while I look around the wall we have hidden behind for attackers.

"I think we have our chance. Run!" I grip her hand and drag her behind me. She screams as a remaining hidden soldier shoots and fires back as we run.

Once we make it to the other side of the street, I let go and urge her in front of me before picking up pace and sprinting from the scene.

Tris

I'm pretty sure I'm going to puke again. My entire body aches and burns like never before and I can't breathe. And even though I don't want to, I know I have to keep running. For my unborn child, for Tobias, for everyone.

So I do.

I follow Tobias until we reach the train tracks nearest to us.

I can hear the horn of the train as it approaches and I smile because it's almost over.

"You okay?" He frowns at me, a concerned look gracing his face. He reaches out to touch the small of my back.

"Um, yeah." I hesitate, feeling something burning in the back of my throat. "Yeah. I just...oh god." I spin around, hunching over as whatever I ate last repels itself from my body.

"Tris!" I hear the alarm in his voice. I can feel his hand hovering above my back, unsure whether to touch me or not.

"I-I'm fine." I groan, standing up and wiping off my mouth.

"You sure?" I can see clearly how much that scared him.

"Yeah. I guess it's part of growing a human." I give him a shaky grin.

"Tris...how long have you been...you know?" He asks, worry on his face.

"I think three months?"

"And you waited this long to tell me?!" His hands go to his head, tugging at the hair. I notice for the first time how much farther it's grown out. I don't know why I didn't tell him. He has just as much right to know. I just didn't know how.

Tobias

Three months. Three months of my girl friend being pregnant and I didn't notice. I'm an idiot.

"I-I...I was scared. I wasn't sure how you'd react! I mean, you got a sixteen year old pregnant!" She wipes hard at her face as tears touch her cheeks. The sight makes me realize how much this is upsetting her. Tris doesn't cry. Tris is the strongest person I know. If she's crying, it means I'm doing something terribly wrong.

"Hey." I take her hands with a gentle touch, bending down so we're at eye level. "Hey, don't cry." I lightly brush away the few fresh tears on her face. "Don't cry. It'll be alright." Her bright eyes are dull, the color of steel, as she looks at me.

"Where do we go?" She asks, her words shaky.

"Nowhere," I kiss her knuckles softly. "not now. We should rest for now. Find a drink so you can rinse your mouth. Let you sleep."

"Okay." To my surprise, she wraps her wiry arms tightly around me. "Thank you."

"You're welcome." I squeeze her to me in response, feeling her fingers on my back. Her palms and the tips of her fingers press to my upper back, leaving tiny spots where I feel just a little warmer.

"Okay." She finally pulls away and takes my hand. I squeeze her hand back, not wanting to let her go. I'm worried she'll disappear if I don't keep a constant touch on her.


	3. Chapter 3

**Sorry it took so long. I had a hard time finding time to do this. I'm having one of those weeks where you don't want to do anything. PE was hell, as you can imagine.**

**Tris**  
><strong>Jumping<strong> on a train pregnant reminds me somewhat of jumping on for my first time period. Even though Tobias runs behind me boosts my foot up, I still have to wiggle inside like a snake. He swings after me and helps me up.  
>"Alright?" I'm feeling better and my feet are staying underneath me so far. Still, I don't let go of my firm grip on his wrist.<br>"Yeah. I'm fine." I nod, letting go. I fall back against the wall of the car and sink to the ground so I can sit.  
>"You don't have to lie." I feel his shoulder pressing against mine.<br>"But I want to." My brain may possibly be an inflatable balloon. That's what it feels like.  
>"You shouldn't."<br>"I should." I look over at him. "I don't want you worrying about me twenty four seven. It's not healthy and it's not smart."  
>"You're ridiculous." He shakes his head.<br>"You need a clear head."  
>"I'm on a train. I'm fine for now."<br>"And when we're not on a train? When we're fighting soldiers and running? You know as well as I do that this problem isn't going to be solved without a lot of force, and you're not to back down from a fight you believe in." Tobias just stares at me long and hard.  
>"You being pregnant changes nothing."<br>"You're a liar."  
>"Will you just listen for five seconds?" He snaps.<br>"Sorry."  
>"Tris, do you know how worried I was about you before I found you on that stupid train car? If I soldier had revealed me then I would've died. I'm at a disadvantage either way." He takes my hand in his and grips it tightly. "So let me worry about you."<br>**Tobias**  
>The train has just about reached the wall and I'm debating just letting Tris sleep more and riding the train for one more loop. She's only slept for ten minutes and the circles under her eyes suggest days of exhaustion.<br>But in the end I know we need out of the city. I wake her up and we jump.  
>"We should get to Amity. They'll probably be serving as a safe house."<br>"Okay." Tris says, rubbing the last of the sleep out of her eyes before taking my hand.  
>I get us through the gates and we walk from there.<br>Amity is a cluster of wooden structures in the middle of huge fields.  
>"We have to find the main gathering area."<br>"Like the Pit." She still seems tired but I think that's just a side effect of growing a human, right? I should have paid more attention in school.  
>"Exactly. Except this Pit won't have riots going on inside."<br>"Of course. Knowing these marshmallows they probably toss around cottonballs for entertainment."  
>"Or roast marshmallows." I suggest. This is good. Talking. It's keeping her awake. I grip her hand tighter and we keep going.<br>"That's cannabalism." She yawns. I asked if she wanted me to carry her before and she said no. Now I wish she would have let me. She looks like she's about to fall over in exhaustion.  
>"Welcome friends. How may we help you?" Two Amity ask once they see us. It's a boy and girl, holding hands. They tilt their heads in our direction.<br>"We need safety." I say, knowing they'll understand me.  
>"I'll go get Johanna." The girl says happily. She runs back towards buildings and the boy leads us after her to the Amity version of a Pit.<p> 


	4. Chapter 4

**Welcome back. For those of you who have read my other divergent writing have met Naomi. I've decided to include her here. Not sure how big of questions role she will play but I'd like to show an alternate path in her life.**

**Tris**

Amity have always been a little odd.

The one leading us is no exception. He sits us at a table in the corner and leaves quickly to find someone named Jeremy. Once he's gone I lean against Tobias and sigh happily. I've been freezing and hes warm.

His arm rests around shoulders and I'm glad because it keeps me close to him. I'm ready to fall asleep but I don't think now is the time. Stupid baby, making me all tired.

The pair of Amity return, someone with them. I recognize her from the Hub and other places as Johanna Reyes, leader of the Amity.

"Welcome Four." She smiles to Tobias and he nods back. "And Beatrice. You go by Tris now, correct?" I'm not sure whether to be bothered by her knowledge of my life or impressed. "I hear you need shelter."

"Yes. If you would be kind enough to offer it." Tobias' voice sounds so polite and proper when he speaks to Johanna. I suppose that is a good thing since she holds our best chance for comradery.

"Perhaps. I'd have to discuss with my faction. For now we can offer safety until the decision. A bed and a meal?"

"That's better than we could hope for. Thank you." This isnt him. This isn't Tobias. This is some calm leader. I can't help but hear the better half of Marcus in his tone.

"Alright. Jeremy, Rica, please show them to a room. I assume they wish to share one. It would feel safer?" She glances between us. I have to admit, the idea of any bed sounds good, but having Tobias there sounds even better. I nod.

**Tobias**

The Amity are long gone, having left us alone to our room. It's very bare. Just a bed and a set if drawers.

"You should lay down." I advise, placing a hand on the small of her back. She looks exhausted, and staying up until the decision this afternoon will only make it worse.

"Do you mind?" She glances at me quickly, but her eyes flick back to the bed almost immediately. Her posture is slumped, her eyes dull with sleep.

"Of course not. You need to sleep." She nods and slides under the cover.

"Come lay down." She yawns, settling her head down onto the pillow. "I meant now, Tobias." She reaches out a sleep heavy arm. I hesitate for a moment before crawling under with her.

The bed does feel warm and soft, but we don't both sleep at once. We'll be completely unguarded. I look over to see Tris already asleep. So I wind my arms around her waist and pull her close.

And lay there and wait for the Amity to call me for the meeting.

**Tris**

When I wake up Tobias is gone. I can tell immediately. My hand is sitting on the bed and the spot is warm, but empty.

I peel my eyes open and look around the Amity room, lit by bright sunshine. I roll over onto the spot where I know Tobias was and look up at the ceiling. He must have left a bit ago because the place he was laying on is almost completely cold.

The Amity ceiling is made of some kind of clay; it's split by hairline fractures. Finally the door opens and an Amity girl slips in. In her hands she has a change of clothes.

She has darker skin, like Uriah, but her is dark and curly, pulled back in loose braids. She wears baggy red and yellow clothing. She doesn't carry herself like an Amity girl though. No, this girl has her chin parallel to the ground, her chocolate eyes bright and intelligent looking. She looks about my age, maybe younger.

"I brought you these. I saw you come in. Your clothes are all dirty." She doesnt speak like an Amity either. Her voice is clear, loud, confident.

"Oh." I look down. Indeed my shirt is streaked with dry mud. The sheets have collected dry gravel and sand from my nap. "Thanks."

She tosses them on the bed and turns to leave. When she reaches the door she stops and turns to look at me. She meets my eyes square.

"What was Dauntless like?" She asks it without shame, without pause. My answers surprises me.

"Fake." The girl nods. "What's Amity like?" She smiles tightly.

"Fake."

"What's your name?" I ask. This girl intrigues me. The Amity who wants to be Dauntless. Who isn't afraid.

"Naomi." I nod back at her.

"Nice to meet you. I'm Tris." She nods and slips back out the door like she was never there.

This world, this system, used to make so much sense when I was a part of it. Except I never mattered until I wasn't. I didn't matter to anybody until I became bigger than Jeanine's pawn, until I became Divergent.

Naomi is the same. She doesn't matter now, but she should. Everyone should. The selfish Abnegation and the cowardly Dauntless and the brave Amity.

"They decided we can stay." Tobias' words cut straight into my thought and I look up to see him leaning against the door.

"Really?" I get up out of bed and walk to him, not bothering with the change of clothes.

"We have to work for our keep, and there's no violence rules, but yes, we can stay." He takes my hands and pulls me toward him.

As I let him I take a breath and let out some of my thoughts and my stress.

"Good."


End file.
